Transformational Connection

Transformational Connection is a practice emphasizing presence, interconnection and aliveness. The practice helps people to explore what is really there between us through staying with present moment experience, skillful communication and embodiment.

What is Transformational Connection

Transformational Connection arose in 2024 as John Thompson and Sean Wilkinson , formerly of Circling Europe left the Circling trademark and renamed their company and the practice. It is a paradoxical term as the practice is fundamentally oriented towards being with what is, rather than changing anything. However the argument is, that being with what is, is a very good way to create the grounds for transformation.

The practice emphasizes being with each other in quite a radical way, trusting that whatever shows up in connection can be a relevant key to deepening the relationship, even though it might be uncomfortable.

It is very powerful to reveal the truth of our experience. Liberating even. It creates intimacy and a sense of connection when we dare to say out loud what is actually going on in and between us. This doesn’t mean that Transformational Connections is only about sharing uncomfortable truths (although that might happen), rather it is a practice of simply sharing what it is like to be present on the one side and deeply listening on the other.

The willingness to share your present moment experience without knowing the outcome brings us into the unknown of the connection, which can be somewhat scary but also very beautiful. When we start showing (or drop) the layers of shielding that keeps us at a safe distance from each other we can find new and more connected ways of relating.

Transformation Connection as a practice supports people in seeing how they can find more connection and aliveness in their lives. It is a communication paradigm that takes time to grasp and integrated, but that can quite profoundly transform the way you experience connection with others.

What does it look like?

Concretely a Transformational Connection session could look something like this. You are in a room with a group of people and the leader starts by guiding you into noticing what it is actually like to be there, in that room right now. As you spend some time in this noticing you might start becoming more aware of your body, and your emotional state (maybe you are a bit nervous as this is the first time in this kind of setting?). You might also “just” be thinking about the annoying thing from work, but when the leader asks you to notice your thoughts you become aware of your thinking in a new way.

After this brief intro exercise the leader asks you to join someone else in a pair. As you sit down with a stranger you are asked to do the same exercise again, simply noticing what it is like to sit there with someone else. Maybe its different than when you were sitting on your own? As you share eye contact with your partner you might also notice emotions (shyness, fear, joy?) arising. As you sit longer in the silence you might experience it as uncomfortable, awkward, peaceful or deeply rewarding, like you truly get to see someone.

The leader then asks you to start sharing your experience with words. Simply telling the other what you are experiencing and noticing. You might be asked to start from the concrete (what are you seeing, like facial expressions, clothing etc.) or jump straight into what is the most present for you (“I just feel so happy sitting here with you”, “I feel super tense after sitting in silence for so long”).

A next step could be that the leader invites in impact, asking you (and your partner) to share more dynamically (“wow. I feel surprise, but also excitement, when I hear about your happiness”, “I get curious about your tension, what is it like? Is it still there?). In this way you support each other in staying with the experience as is is emerging and evolving.

After 10-15 minutes time you are asked to find a way to end the exercise together and join the big group again. Possibly there will be a few minutes for sharing impact from the exercise with the group before moving on to a new practice.

Focus circles

Most Transformational Connection workshops will consist of many of these small, intimate meetings in pairs or triads guided by a context set by the leader. We are practicing the capacity to listen or to “be with the other in their world” and to skillfully sharing our own experience by “owning experience”.

Another component of many Transformational Connection workshops is focus circles, where one person has the attention of a small group for a longer time. Each group will have a leader who explains the exercise, asks who in the group would like to be “circled” and then starts the practice. Typically there will be a short meditation where the leader directs the attention of the group towards the person in focus.

The practice often starts with the leader asking the person in focus something like “what is it like to be you right now”. They might share that they are slowly landing in having this much attention, that they feel shy or that they are simply loving being here. Someone in the group might share that hearing about the shyness makes them feel like they want to show that they are friendly, but that they don’t quite know how to do that.

This again leads to the person in focus sharing that they really appreciate the friendliness and that they feel softer and warmer in their body now. This inspires the leader to say that they really enjoy hearing that and would want for the person in focus to stay with the experience for a bit. The person in focus then shares that they feel frustrated and it feels like they are being asked what to do, which makes the leader ask what the frustration is like.

In this way the role of the group and the leader is to stay with the person in focus from moment to moment, bringing their curiosity and present moment experience into connection in service of really being with the person in the center.

Related practices

Transformational Connection is in many ways similar to Circling and Relatefulness, while Surrendered Leadership is a particular leadership paradigm and practice format, that has grown out of the practice.

Circling

The Original Circling® Approach is a way of relating that has the capacity to reveal your unique gifts and set a new precedent for what is possible in authentic relationships. The practice is based on authenticity, deep empathic listening and meditative presence.

Relatefulness

The Relateful Company was founded around 2020. Originally based on the Circling Europe tradition of Circling, Relatefulness has developed its own flavour over the years. https://www.relateful.com

Surrendered Leadership

The premise for Surrendered Leadership is that in order to lead others, you must surrender yourself. It is an act of trust in yourself, life and the leadership of others. In this way you’re inviting others to lead themselves by embodying the thing you want to see in the world.

Leaders of Transformational Connection

There are many leaders around the world who lead Transformational Connection. We have quite a few in our network, but if you can’t see anyone below who are close to where you want to practice, contact us and we can direct you to someone closer to you.

Anežka Marie Sokol

I work for more thriving humans in a more thriving world by helping people develop relational & interpersonal skills. I work with leaders, teams and individuals. I have been in the game of process facilitation & education for 10+ years and am educated in chemical engineering, mindfulness & Circling.

Einar Magnús Boson

Ernest Holm Svendsen

Lærke Inanna Trunjé

Mareike Christensen

Martje Witzel

I am a leader of Surrendered Leadership and Transformational Connection events in Europe and online. I offer 1:1 presence based sessions where I support people to lead a life in deeper relationship with themselves and the world. I love mystery, being in wild nature and building altars.

Peter Munthe-Kaas

I am a Copenhagen based researcher, body therapist, coach and workshop facilitator. I am interested in practices that support me and others in relating and listening better and believe that the ability to relate to myself, others, society and nature is key to living a happy life in service of what is good in the world.

Ronja Lofstad

Ronja Lofstad discovered circling in 2014 and it has been an active part of her life since. She has facilitated circling evenings, weekends, retreats and courses for years and is a senior leader for Transformational Connection (formerly Circling Europe). Ronja is deeply inspired by nature and silence and spends a lot of time outdoors, listening to forests and mountains.

Upcoming Transformational Connection events

These are the Transfomational Connection events that are coming up on Relating Arts.

Sorry. Aparently we don't have any upcoming Transformational Connection events on Relating Arts.

Where to learn

There is currently only one school where you can learn how to lead Transformational Connection. Transformational Connection hosts the SAS 6 month training that will give you a sense of the practice and where you can certify to lead it.